Brutal self-honesty. I've had those in my life who genuinely modeled this - at times to their own peril.
It's hard to be honest, truly honest with one's self without going dark isn't it? Being self-critical by nature, many if not most of us have to be very careful. It's like having a ticking time-bomb in our laps.
Of course the alternatives are crazy too. Things such as:
-Self-deception, (toward the up side) or as Paul warns, "not to think more highly of yourselves then you ought to."
-Non-reflection. Either you "just say NO" to thinking about self, or you drown out reflective thought by multiplication of distraction, movies, music, work, games, etc.
-Substance abuse. Ingestion of non-reality or a false reality by altering your own mental processes via chemical substance.
All of these are done for the sake of survival. It's just how we've learned to cope with our own tragic existences.
No wonder Paul strove for "the mind of Christ". Philippians 2 and 3 are pretty crucial texts in this regard. So is that strange but necessary self-analysis in Romans 7, especially v17 & v20, "it is therefore no longer I that do it, but sin that dwells in me"??????
Gotta be a place for that somewhere, huh? Identity shift. Not blame-shift, but identity shift. I know that is true, though I've seldom been able to actualize it in my own experience.
But this I know - if you have those in your life who know you and yet love you anyway regardless of your screwed-up self then be grateful - they are Christ's gift to you, a reflection of His own love, eternal, unconditional.
"...for I will never leave you or forsake you". (Hebrews 13:5)